Monday 10 August 2009

Edinburgh festival plus Lewis Schaffer Review: moron

So, went to a free show at the Edinburgh comedy festival on Sunday,four comics all doing a short free set to plug their full shows. In general pretty good show, but one guy bugged me. Lewis Shaffer, American guy, decides to pick on the Scottish/English relationship, which is perfectly fine by me - as long as you do it for the right reasons. Lewis Shaffer did not.

He seemed pretty intent on portraying Scots as mean spirited wankers who are jealous of the English. One of the points he made was that 90% of the Scottish population live in a small population belt "hugging the English border" supposedly something to do with our jealousy or resentment towards English people. It was around this point I let my body language illustrate how unamusing I found Lewis Shaffer's observations to be, because that one at least was pure fucking bullshit.

Ever seen a map of Scotland Mr Shaffer? I'm going to presume not, because if you had you'd have noticed that the vast majority of land north of what you referred to as the Glasgow-Edinburgh belt is covered in one of the following: mountains, hills, valleys or lochs, or commonly a whole bunch of these stuck together. So where do the majority of people live? The mountainous and hilly areas with little terrain suitable for building, agriculture or livestock? Of course they fucking don't, they live on the fucking flat bit in the South with all the fucking arable land you stupid cunt. If you have a look at an actual map of Scotland you'll see that the main population centres are central Scotland and the East coast, because those are the fucking flat bits.

So due to my unamused demeanour Lewis Schaffer decides to pick on me as an example of grumpy Scots, who can't even appreciate a free show apparently. Well I'm not laughing at something just because it's free Lewis Schaffer, to illustrate the point Matt Green came on after you and got 3x the laughs out of the audience, I myself was in fucking stitches. Nothing to do with your artificially constructed British stereotype bullshit, you just weren't funny to me.

I have used the name Lewis Schaffer far more than strictly necessary here, I'm just hoping he's the kind of comic who likes to google his name to see if hes been reviewed, and since this is the month of the festival there's a decent chance he will and he'll read this and know why the guy in the glasses and the black t-shirt wasn't laughing.


After the free thing we went to go see Richard Coughlan (who I know from YouTube as coughlan666) unfortunately the bastard never turned up, might catch him another night. Matt Green who I mentioned above was pretty fucking funny, I hope I can catch his full show another time too.

freedoms_stain, victim of another man's stupidity, out

3 comments:

Chris Wright said...

I saw him last night at 'The Spirit of the Fringe', possibly the same event?

You are EXACTLY right. He is a major TWAT.

Anonymous said...

''One of the points he made was that 90% of the Scottish population live in a small population belt "hugging the English border" supposedly something to do with our jealousy or resentment towards English people.''

I think this is a hoot. You need to chill out.

Laura (from Glasgow)

freedoms_stain said...

I dunno Laura, Chris Wright up there agrees with me, I think I like him better, sorry.